Special Comment

Entries from January 2009

Another Year, Another Abortion Protest

January 22, 2009 · 3 Comments

Every year, an anniversary of Roe v. Wade happens. And every year, Pro-Lifers descend on DC to march against abortion.

Last year I wrote a long post about the 35th anniversary of Roe v. Wade, its effect on the nation, and what I believe the law is really about — specifically, about the right for women to be the ones making choices about their bodies.

This year, a mere 48 hours after Obama took office, the march started anew. And many have noted the distinct difference in feel. No longer is there a Pro-Life president in the White House. No longer is there an ultra-conservative regime.

Yet our rights remain threatened. I do not understand the people who so actively fight for the illegality of abortion. Certainly, I understand the moral and human arguments. I understand how, as a human, you could be incredibly uncomfortable taking a life that is growing inside of you. I don’t claim to know where the point of conception is, and I’m not a doctor so I don’t care to speculate. But what I do know is that, as an adult and as a woman, I am more than capable of knowing what is right for me, and under the law I should have the same rights as any man in this country — that is, the right to be the only mind in control of my body. The argument against abortion contains, inherently, the implication that women are not worthy of having complete control of their physical person, like a man is. It contains, implicitly, the notion that we are inferior, that the government must think on our behalf. That it must tell us what to do when we become pregnant. And that is wrong. Just as the decision to remove a tumor is up to the patient in which it is growing, the decision to end a pregnancy should always be up to the woman carrying the fetus.

I had a conversation with my close college friend’s father the night before the inauguration about abortion. It came at the end of a rather lovely dinner. My friend and her dad were arguing about who among them was more liberal than the other (she works for a Democratic congressman and was part of Joe Biden’s campaign; it was the most adorable argument I’ve ever seen), when she said she was to the left of him on abortion rights. As they are a, clearly, staunchly liberal pair, I inquired as to his beliefs. The answer he gave me surprised me: he said that he believes that men should have reproductive rights. It’s a loaded statement, because it could mean a number of things (some of which I can’t help but bristle at). He explained that he believes that men should have some kind of say, or some way to legally express their opinion, about whether their girlfriend/wife/partner should have an abortion because, assuming they do not stay together and she has the baby, he will be obligated to pay child support for that child. And he believes that men should be able to use whether or not they wanted the baby to mitigate said child support.

I can’t help but see his point. I don’t think men who, from the start, are aggressively (read: passionate, not violent) against the birth of a child they conceived should have to pay as much child support as men who had children willingly, but whose spousal/partner relationships didn’t work out. But I cautioned her father that giving men a real say in abortion is wrong and threatening; that this is a women’s rights issue. And he argued back that it was a medical technology issue — that one day, when technology is advanced enough, we’ll essentially have reverse abortion; women will be sterile until they choose the time at which they would like to have a child, at which point their normal fertility will be restored (think of it as a super-strengh IUD).

And, again, I cautioned him: that is not the answer, and that is not the issue. As I’ve said on this blog before, I do not know if I will ever be able to have an abortion. I know I do not want to be pregnant, and as a woman I take steps to avoid that situation: I take birth control pills, and I use condoms. But should it happen, I need to know that, as a human and as a woman, I have the right to have a safe and sterile medical procedure that will eliminate a pregnancy I do not want. I will not — I will not — raise a child I am not ready for or capable of taking care of, and it is my right as a woman and as an American to be the one in charge of that decision. The government should not have a say. Strangers and religious zealots should not have a say. It is not their body, it is my body. And it is, and should always be my choice.

I agree that we must work together to educate children about sex, protection, and pregnancy. With the right amount of education we could drastically reduce the number of unwanted pregnancies each year. A reduction in conception is a reduction in abortion, always. But while we work to make sex safer and pregnancy more controllable, we must always protect the right of women to control their bodies. It’s my body, it’s my life, and it’s my choice.

Categories: constitution · culture · health · history · news · politics · religion · supreme court · women
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The Midnight Disease

January 15, 2009 · Leave a Comment

writers_block_blog

It’s taken me 13 days to write this post.

It seems like ages ago that words used to spill from my fingertips with little or no thought. There seemed to be endless stories built up in my head, and they would pop out at the strangest times, the oddest hours, and I would let them. I would sit up in bed with a notebook, or at my computer, and without any hesitation or self-reflection I would let those words do what they wanted to all over the place. Sometimes the stories that came out were complete drivel; sometimes I’d edit and revist in a couple days and beam with pride. But no matter whether they were good or bad, best thrown out or keepers, they were always there.

And then one day, they weren’t.

Before they left me, they put themselves into a 200+ page magnum opus of cultural theory, my undergraduate thesis, an intense study of four years, one country, and one band. Those words served me well, and when I was done and the accolades were mine to collect freely, they declared themselves on vacation and never came back.

This weekend promises change. This weekend I start a short story class. But I can’t help but feel that I’m blowing my money because my words left me, they left me long ago, and now I’m just a dried up shell of a writer with the desire to write and none of the tools. And how, exactly, is a class going to bring that back? And do I want to subject myself to the embarassment of trying? Do I want to hear how bad it’s become?

And that, my friends, is the root of the whole problem. It’s been 3 years since I had a real outlet for my thoughts, and with the atrophy of my practical writing skills has come the atrophy of my confidence. As soon as words go to paper I am sure they are bad. And reassurance doesn’t help. Of course, reassurance isn’t forthcoming because I’d rather play the fool, the idiot with no talent and no ambition, than show people what I really want to be. Because what if they hate it?

I don’t want anyone I know to think I’m a talentless hack. Worse, I suspect more and more that the less writing I do, the more talentless and hacky I become. This is a vicious cycle. A painful vicious cycle that saps all of your energy and shrinks your brain — I’m not kidding, I can feel it shriveling up in my skull.

All I want is some relief. I want to write something again. I want a two hour burst of extreme creativity and I want to finally, sweating, crying, pull away from the page and look over what I did and feel good about it.

I don’t know if I ever will again.

Categories: personal · writing
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Happy New Year

January 1, 2009 · Leave a Comment

Well. We made it.

It’s been a long, long year. But now it’s over. Now it’s a whole new year, with a whole nuew number that I will write incorrectly for at least a week, as I do every year. It will be surreal, and I will feel old, and nothing will change, and everything will change, and it’ll be a wild adventure because everything this year is going to be new, and oh yeah, we’re all poor.

So here are a few resolutions, not that anyone sticks to them anyway:

1. I will eat more lentils. They keep really well, and they’re cheap.
2. I will be more patient.
3. I will stop thinking I should have some sort of major career and totally settled, successful life, because I’m 24 and my panicking just makes everyone else I know hate me.
4. I will stop thinking I’m fat. I’m not fat.
5. I will read more.
6. I will stop watching The Hills. I kill enough braincells the old-fashioned (green) way.
7. I will return my Netflix movies after I watch them instead of letting them languish on my DVD player for three weeks while I berate myself for constantly forgetting things.
8. I will keep laughing at GOOP because it’s good to cut rich, spoiled people down to size, even only in my mind.
9. I will write. Every day, I will write.

That’s a good start, I think. And if I can keep even three of those, I’m well on my way to a brilliant year.

Happy new year, everyone. 2009. Wow. We made it.

Categories: personal
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